Frosty the Blowman

In the fine tradition of R-rated holiday romps like Office Christmas Party and the Seth Rogen one I can’t recall the name of comes the heart-warming tale of an anthropomorphic sack of yayo.

After a shady street magician is picked up on charges of fraud and burglary his costume is seized into evidence along with the purloined goods, to the delight of Officer Hinkle who is the clerk in the evidence room on Christmas Eve. Hinkle decides to wear the gaudy top hat and cloak while smoking a joint behind the precinct. Soon he is snoozing at his desk and the hat rolls off his head right onto a pile of cocaine from a drug bust earlier in the week, and against all logic creates the titular Blowman who springs into existence shouting “Let’s get crunked!” While Hinkle takes in the scene wide-eyed and marveling at how strong weed is nowadays Frosty spirits off into town to give the children and their parents a frantic and fast-paced holiday they will never forget. Jim Caviezel stars as Frosty in the role only he could describe as “even bigger than Jesus”.