Project 2025 was just a cover for the Heritage Foundation’s sexiest plot yet, Project 2069! Realizing that they are losing a numbers game, and unable to rig every election, the GOP decides to hold onto power the only way they can — through the forced sterilization of the woke, lib cucks! Who needs thoughts and prayers when you’ve created a sterilizationmobile that can kill liberal sperm from over a hundred yards away? The goal? Build a better, whiter society for the children-of-the-children of the corn.
What they didn’t realize was that effete elite know the truth. Climate change, nuclear proliferation, and Matthew Perry’s death have locked in our expired by date. What the Grand Old Parry doesn’t know is that there isn’t more than 50 years left on this godforsaken mud ball. And all they’ve done is given the trans mob an excuse for Consequence-less sex. It’s the MAGA children who are going to have to grapple with the end. But then again, Christian Conservatives not giving a damn about children or the future is pretty on brand for them.
Less a film and more a roadmap for the next few GOP conventions, it’s Tucker Carlson’s wet dream come true and put to celluloid. Or maybe a solid state hard drive.