Keurig Cup: The Movie:

It’s no secret that when it comes to childrens movies the real money’s in the merchandising. The number of potential action figures that can compete for screentime is the yardstick that this artform is measured by. But there always remains a key problem- the kids want the merch, but the apathetic parents have the money. And on and on we go, with the studios endlessly clinging to the prayer that whining and crying will eventually bring the two into alignment. But the answer has been hiding in plain sight: it’s harder to say no to coffee than whining. Join Captain Breakfast Blend as he and his team of 50 differently named and outfitted coffee pods take on the evil Galactic Dark Roast Empire. Will little Timmy beg for the cuddly Mochasaurus or sharp-tongued Robusto Robot? Perhaps he’s more of an Arabica Squadron sampler with latte packs sold separately type of kid? With a climactic battle involving over 200 different k-cup compatible coffee makers and accessories, there’s something for everyone!